We Need To Talk About Friend Break-ups and Losses We don’t talk about friend break-ups enough. There are two reasons I want to discuss it here. First, losing a friend can be just as devastating as the end of a romantic relationship, and sometimes even more so. Second, it’s important to know you are allowed…
What is EMDR Therapy? You’ve heard people talk about EMDR, but what the heck is it? EMDR, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, is a special therapeutic way to process trauma and painful or disturbing memories so they have far less emotional impact in the present. This can help you feel more calm, improve your sleep, and…
A support group (or group therapy) is not usually the first thing we think of when seeking help for our mental health. I get it – it can feel very vulnerable and risky to bring your personal pain and struggle to a room (or virtual room) full of strangers. Other concerns I’ve heard include, “I…
“Am I being too picky? Maybe I should give them another chance. Sometimes things are good. I shouldn’t even be thinking this way, doubting things. It started so well, but now I’m not sure…” The Chemistry is a Drug We’re all bombarded with this idea that one day, love will hit us like a bolt…
You’ve made it through the minefield that is the family holiday season. 2025 is arriving, and as usual, everywhere you go (physically or virtually) you’re told that January’s start must usher in a fresh, new beginning for you as well. Soon, the gyms will be packed, spending will be low, sobriety will be high (pun…
Do you have a perfect family that is just super accepting, wildly supportive and celebrates you exactly as you are? Is your family open-minded, direct in their communication, clear in their boundaries, and emotionally mature? Oh. Hmm no? Not so much? It would be nice if we all were lucky enough to have that kind…
Someone pissed me off on my neighborhood walk this morning. The thing they did is, admittedly, a general pet peeve of mine, but today I noticed that my internal reaction was a bit disproportionate. Here’s the scenario: I’m walking alone down the sidewalk, and I come up against two or three people moving in the…
It is not lost on me – “The Agnostic Therapist,” an EXvangelical queer woman who helps clients recover from religious harm – that my favorite team, the San Diego Padres, is named after the Catholic Franciscan Friar missionary colonizers who forced their religion on the indigenous folks of this region. Talk about religious trauma! I…
I am old enough to be Chappell Roan’s mom. In February 1998, when she was born, I was in my senior year of college at UC San Diego. My 15 year old adores her. Watching parts of the recent VMAs made me feel like a great-grandma. What I am trying to say here is that…
Dating is hard. From the first flirtation (whether DM or IRL), to waiting to hear back after a first date, to ending a situationship that’s gone awry, it can be rough out there. And if you’re queer, your dating pool is whittled down significantly from the general population. So when you find someone who lights…